“Do you want a boy or a girl?” It’s a question that comes up for every pregnant woman. And the answer is almost certainly: “I want a healthy baby, most of all!” This familiar refrain goes right to the heart of why many women spend so much time worrying about their developing baby. Instead of delving deep into the “what you can’t do” list once again, this time, let’s look at the other side: what not to worry about.

The idea for this topic came from an article by Ann Douglas in Healthy Woman magazine. We have talked about Ann before: she’s a Canadian author specializing in pregnancy, birth, babies and motherhood with more than 20 books to her credit. While she wrote about the ten things not to worry about, our approach is a bit less formal. Still, Ann’s phrase, “pregnancy doesn’t have to be an exercise in martyrdom,” really covers our approach, too.

It turns out that the kind of lifestyle that is good for your baby is at least as good for you. Good eating, some exercise and avoiding the bad habits are all good. They make for a healthy pregnancy and a healthy mom. Certainly, some of the things that affect a baby’s development are beyond the mother’s control, but a healthy lifestyle provides the best conditions for a baby’s growth.

A common concern is about the safety of exercise for mothers-to-be. “Will I hurt my baby if I exercise?” they ask. The answer is exactly the opposite. For a low-risk pregnancy with no complications exercise can help both the mother and her baby. The benefits of fitness include increased energy, reduced stress for mom, and research suggests that moderate exercise may also be beneficial for the fetus.

Swimming is a great way to exercise during pregnancy as the water helps support extra weight and reduce the chance of muscle strain. Walking and low-impact aerobics are also good choices. On the other hand, many physicians suggest avoiding activities such as horseback riding and skiing — more chance of falls and injury. And scuba diving may not be a good idea as we don’t know about the effects of water pressure on the fetus. How much exercise is even easier to answer: Just listen to your body! If you are feeling tired or uncomfortable, ease off or stop.

Some other concerns that come up during pregnancy include sex, falling and flying. First, sex during a low-risk pregnancy should not be a worry. While some caution is warranted later in the term, intercourse is perfectly safe.

Falls? A simple fall, unless it was directly on the abdomen, should not have any effect on the baby. Naturally, a serious tumble or vehicle accident should probably send you to your doctor — better to err on the side of caution. As for flying while pregnant, it’s safe as long as the cabin is pressurized.

The process of making a baby takes a lot of energy and can tax a mother’s resources. Is it any wonder, then, that a pregnant woman is often tired? The guideline is once again to listen to your body. Some ideas include going to bed earlier, taking a nap after work or dinner or even a “power nap” during lunch. And remember, it’s not laziness, a mother’s body works very hard to create this new baby, even if it’s not showing much yet.

As for smoking, alcohol and drugs… need we say anything? I didn’t think so.

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Call-out: “The benefits of fitness include increased energy, reduced stress and research even suggests that moderate exercise may also be beneficial for the fetus.”